Dark Feeling

This is first time I am using English to write my blog since I want to improve my English as much as I can within this half year.

I am very sad today. I feel that I am foolish guy.
I cant write a proper sentence by English.
I cant show confident to my interview.
I forget all coding when I taking the interview test.
Poor english, poor knowledge...... those factor hurt my heart deeply and deeply .

Today I attended career fair that implemented by UTAR. I get the call from Lintramax company for asking me to interview yesterday. I walk along the office, I muse on which company I want to interview and do I really attend the interview?

Finally, Lintramax company staff talk to me, then I tell him i get the call from their company yesterday. He give me a programming question ask me answer within 45 minutes. I stuck at there when i read the first question. I do not know how to do it.

After 45 minutes, I complete some question but still have a lot haven't complete. the staff come in and collect the question paper and bring me go to interview. When i reach the office, he ask me wait a while and go in inform the boss. After 5-10 second , he ask me go in.

I see the boss sit at there, and say good evening to me. But I think I say 'Good Morning' to him at that time because I feel very nervous and I can't think anymore. He behavior shown he is a good attitude person and professional person. He stand up welcome and shake hand with me. After that, ask me some question. I use my broken english talk to him and i cant speak a proper sentences.

He say they will inform me within two week. When i hear this sentence, I know i just have very lowest chances to get this job.  OMG , i feel down at that time, I cant see any light in my world.

After interview, me , shu and wei xuan having our breakfast + lunck + dinner at OldTown White Coffee shop. I think a lot of my interview. Which is , 'Why I so Useless', 'Why I so foolish'.....

After finish our foods, we back home and sleep.
I woke up at 8pm, I start to do my technopreneurship assignment.
But i cant finish it although just few paragraph, because I am no good in english. I feel sad.

So, I make a ferocious determination, I want impove my english within half hear start form now . That's why i use english to write my blog. I decide just can relax half an hour in each day.

I feel sleepy now ...... good night to everyone and myself.  
God bless me.